A Hot Mess

That was me this weekend. Despite the best intentions and a plan!

Friday night, Hubby and I went for our usual happy hour with friends. I planned for two drinks (and figured out early based on ABV/PPV what I would be drinking). I stuck to that plan. I did not order any other beers and/or any food. I did however accept the 3 tasting glasses of beer that friends handed me. I drank 30 PPV on Friday!!! I loooooove craft beer. But apparently the higher ABVs are killing me. I need to find some love alcohol session beers. :(

Saturday was my nieces birthday (18!). We went to Cheddars for dinner. Cheddars does not have ANY nutritional data available. SO, I looked at the menu ahead of time and planned on eating half of a grilled chicken meal with veggies as sides. Which I did. My nieces ordered queso and potato skins for the table. I steered clear of the potato skins, but had a few of the chips. I also had a large margarita (didn't know it was going to be large, just ordered a rita). 16 point drink!!! I managed to stay within my PPV for the week and didn't use any Activity PPV, but still. WOW. I also managed to get in my run Saturday before dinner. :-)

I bought a ActiveLink from WW today. I have to spend the next 8 days not doing deliberate exercise so it gets an accurate reading of what I've been doing up to this point. Will pick up C25K (W2,D1) next Monday.

First Weekly Weigh in: LOST 4.4 POUNDS!!!! WOOT!!!!!!

So Far So Good - Though I'm Sleepy!

I"m sure the sleepiness has nothing to do with being OP. I've been getting 7 to 8 hours of sleep a night though and still feeling completely rundown. Every time I get in a car (even if I'm driving!!), I have to fight the urge to nod off. Not sure what's going on, but I hope it goes away as quickly as it came.

So the other day I mentioned that weight loss was not my only goal for the year. I also had a few other categories that I wanted to focus on and maybe delve a little deeper into. One of them was my faith and I mentioned that I've been pretty much failing at doing daily devotionals. Well you know what? Since I wrote that, I've been doing better. This week I've been focusing on the chant below in the morning and before I got to bed at night. Paganism is a very, very diverse belief system and it kind of works differently for every single person out there. In *my* practice, I do not actually believe in a God and Goddess as supreme beings. I do believe that there is a common energy that connects us all and that it makes a certain amount of sense to think of that energy as being male and female. The Christian God is male. His son is male. A lot of other Pagans believe that there is an actual Goddess (or mother nature) looking out for us. I think the energy that flows between us all is both male and female. It's up to us to maintain our balance within the flow. Anywho! This week's devotional:

Mother Moon come to me
This I call and ask of thee
Let me feel your strength again
And find the Goddess that resides within.

Tonight is the full Rose moon, also known as the Willow moon, Alder moon, Growing moon and See moon. See what I mean about different pagans having different beliefs? LOL! I will be celebrating the esbat by doing some garden work, cooking dinner for myself and Hubby and then doing a little meditation in the moon's glow (if she isn't hidden by clouds like she was last month). I am also going to do a little ritual asking for some clarity and inspiration. I've been thinking a lot about the new career path thing and I've had some ideas, but for the most part they are jumbled and chaotic. I'd like to get my thoughts under a little more control and start doing real planning for change.

So - yesterday's progress report:

26 Daily PPV
1 Weekly PPV
27 Total PPV

I took a little 10 minute walk at lunch but I didn't bother putting it in the tracker. According to WW, I need to be striving for 2 APPV a day. That seems a little daunting right now, but I'm going to give it the ol' college effort! Tonight is a running night, so I'll get in 3APPV.

See you tomorrow!

The Beer is Gonna Kill Me

I think the hardest part of staying OP this time is going to be the beer. Hubby and I are really part of the beer scene where we live. Most of our friends are people we've met through beer festivals or craft beer meetups. Beer is very much a part of our social calendar (the biggest part, in fact). I am not willing to give up beer. I'm cutting back and I hope that suffices. In the meantime, every Wednesday, we have a thing called the Twitter Bottle Share, where all our beer friends drink the same beer and talk about it on Twitter. Tonight's beer is costing me 8 PPV. :( Out of 26. Brought a very low-PPV meal for lunch today and I'm planning to eat a low PPV dinner tonight. Been trolling the WW website looking for meals that offer the most filling bang for the lowest PPV buck, so to speak. It's good to know ahead (and plan accordingly) what your hangups are going to be. Now I need to formulate my plan of attack.

Day 2 Back on Program

Yesterday was my second full day back on program. I can't tell you how many vegetables and bits of fruit I ate. I knew I wanted to have a beer last night, so I basically ate zero point foods all day long and a low point dinner so I could enjoy my beer. The first two weeks this go-round, I'm going to allow myself to eat my Weekly points, but not my Activity points. In two weeks (starting May 6), I'll try two weeks eating Activity points, but not Weekly points. I want to see which method works best.

Started back on C25K last night. W1D1 in the bag!

4/23/13:
26 Daily PPV
1 Weekly PPV
27 Total PPV

3 Activity PPV earned (20 mins walk (3.2mph); 8 mins run (4.5mph) 1.66 miles

Hello Weight Watchers My Old Friend, I've Come to Talk With You Again

"...because a vision softly creeping, left it's seeds while I was sleeping. And the vision that was planted in my brain, still remains, within the vision of obesity."

I can't tell you how sacrilegious it felt typing a parody of such a classic song. LOL! So, as you may have guessed by the title, I am back on Weight Watchers. I'm not even going to try to remember how many times I've tried before now. I'm going to just devote a little bit of myself for trying to make this the last time.

I apparently have like hobby-ADD. As soon as I start focusing on one interest, all other interests go flying out the window. I'm pretty cyclical though, so I always end up coming back around to them. I'm going to do my best (with this blog's help) to stop that pattern though. Surely I can focus time and energy on more than one thing? I know it's a little late in the year, but today I wrote up a list of goals for 2013. It includes sections for Health, Faith, Career and Finances.

Health:
my weight is a pretty obvious one here
blood pressure
cholesterol
BMI





Faith:
I don't really run around announcing this (the world is a cranky, cranky place just looking to pick fights), but I'm a Pagan. Truly a Tree Hugging Dirt Worshiper. I think that because my faith is something I try to keep close to the vest, I don't spend nearly enough time participating in it. Even if it means coming out of the "broom closet," I want to be more in tune with my spirituality. So, to that end, I've been trying to make a point of celebrating the Esbats and Sabbats this year. I've also been trying to make myself meditate (I can't tell you how challenging this is for me), and I've been mostly failing at doing daily devotions.

Career:
I have hated my job almost as long as I've had it (ten years next week). It's time to put up or shut up when it comes to career unhappiness. I can stay where I'm at as long as they'll have me (we're constantly under threat of layoff) and make a pretty penny with decent benefits. Or I can figure out what the hell I want to be when I grow up and take a leap of faith (in myself, not so much a religious leap of faith) and venture into unknown territory. I think about this daily. I need to stop thinking and start acting. Unless I'm thinking while running, then I can accomplish Health and Career objectives in one go! ;-)

Finances:
As part of any career leaps of faith, I need to get as debt-free as possible. Especially when I'm under constant threat of layoffs! I need to get my credit card and student loans paid off. I seriously have less than $10k of debt left (not counting our outrageous mortgage). I just need to finish it off.

Okay, so it felt good putting it all in writing. Now if I lose my piece of paper, my goals will live on in internet infamy. :-)

So - tracking! I created a new Weight Watchers profile Sunday night at 11 (LOL), so my new tracking date is Sunday. Obviously I did not track food and/or beverages I consumed Sunday. But I have been tracking every bite and sip since! So far so good. Let's do it for real this time, shall we?

Goal: 130
Current: 172

The Quiet Killer

I found this "Quiet Workout" the other day on Pinterest and then tried it Tuesday afternoon. I am STILL sore. I remember thinking during the workout, "Yeah, I'm sweating, but I don't really think this is actually doing anything for me." HA!! Let me tell you, if you need a quick 10 minute killer workout (that's also QUIET), look no further!

For whatever reason I can't get Blogger to accept the picture of the workout, but if you Google "back on pointe quiet workout" you should be able to find it.

Ladies of Craft Beer

Ironically, my first day back on the blog was my worst day "on program" since I started back. LOL! Last night was the Houston Ladies of Craft Beer 3rd Thursday meetup. The four beers I consumed seemed to loosen me up enough that not only did I eat a pork banh mi, but I split an order of pork fries as well. :S No more goodies for me this weekend! Now I need to spend the weekend eating right and getting in some exercise. It was good to see the ladies though. I hadn't seen one of them in two months. Was good to catch up.

Hi. Remember Me?

I'm not dead. Nor am I at my goal weight. In fact, I lost all momentum and climbed back up to the 160s. There is a part of me that is deeply ashamed of that. BUT! One thing I have learned that I think is truer than true - the way that you talk to yourself completely impacts everything you do. If I beat myself up, I will hurt myself. The best I can do for myself is get up, dust off, give myself a hug and start the journey from where I'm at. So this is me doing that. Welcome back. ;)

Two months ago, Hubby found out he had really high cholesterol, incredibly high triglycerides and moderately high blood pressure. All of a sudden, he had an epiphany. He wanted to get healthy. His only stipulation - I can change the way we eat and he will exercise, but I'm not allowed to change the beer. LOL! I can live with that. The journey (all one and a half weeks of it so far) is very different with a lifemate who is participating. He's asking questions and counting calories. He even has his own SparkPeople account!!

One of the things Hubby and I are trying that really seems to be helping is eating our biggest meal of the day at lunch instead of dinner. It is such an easy change to make! By eating our biggest meal in the middle of the day, we give ourselves longer to digest. With a small dinner, we're not still ridiculously full at bedtime. And it really seems to be working. This small change and tracking food and exercise on SparkPeople are working.

1/7/13:   168
1/14/13:  164.8

Need to Remember This

It's my choice. I'm the one in charge. The only one who can stop me is me.

Wow...I Suck

I'm so sorry! I can't believe I haven't been on here since College Station. :( Since then, I have run another 5K (3 minutes slower), hurt my leg and recovered for two weeks, kept (mostly) to the eating, and dropped another 6 pounds. I broke the 150 mark yesterday by .4 pounds. This morning I was a solid 149. Committing to never going back over 150!! Today is also a run day! :) I have restarted the C25K program, this time concentrating on going faster during my runs. Whereas I started the program last time at 4mph and was up to 4.8mph when I finished, this time I'm starting at 5.5mph during the runs.

I am still not back on WW proper. I'm trying to get used to using SparkPeople, which was recommended on a blog I love (Runs For Cookies). I really like Spark, in that they have way more foods in their database, but I'm not a huge fan of their recipe builder. Most of the time, I don't want to actually put in a recipe, I just want to find out what the calorie count, etc is on the completed product, and each serving. SparkRecipes actually wants you to put in the directions, etc for the recipe.I guess I just need to commit a whole day to putting our favorite recipes in there so I can access them easily.

So, I know I've said this before, but I'd really like to recommit to this blog! I don't know what's wrong with me that I'll spend 5 hours surfing Pinterest, but can't give 10 minutes to update the blog. The blog helps with accountability! So let's take it one day at a time, okay? :-)

Weight: 149lbs

College Station 5K

What an amazing time we had in College Station! Kris, Sara and I got ourselves into all kinds of trouble and had a great time relaxing with girl time. :-) I seriously hope we make an annual pilgrimage to C-town for the Rock the Casa 5K. What an amazing time!

The race itself wandered through a neighborhood beside the sorority row. Every now and then, cars would be heading towards us, but the cops did a good job of keeping us safe. The most notable thing about the 5K was the enthusiasm of the group putting it on. The Theta girls (and I'm assuming their boyfriends) lined the roads with signs, ran with speaker-backpacks playing good music, and cheered like crazy for their runners. There was never an opportunity to contemplate not finishing, because there was always someone there screaming for you. Seriously a great event I'd like to repeat. And that being said, I PR'ed!!!!! :-) My time on this run was 34:14!! That is 10 MINUTES and 20 seconds off my previous run. Holy moly!! I know there is still a lot of room for improvement, but I am pretty damn happy with those results. :-) Hoping the Yuri's Night 5K coming up this Saturday will be just as awesome. :-)

Day One Back, Not a Smashing Success

Something totally crazy is going on with my food. I fell like I'm starving all day long at work (though I eat breakfast, and have a sandwich, strawberries, grapes and carrots at work), then I get home and I snack ALL NIGHT LONG!! Yesterday, I ate all my nutritious food I brought for lunch then went home and enjoyed my nutritious dinner PLUS:

a gingersnap
3 pieces of candy (my brother-in-law is a chocolateur)
a flour tortilla
3 chips (Chester Cheese Poofs - they're 1 PPV for 10 poofs)
4 Ritz crackers with 1 T blue cheese spread (Rondele - YUMMY)
2 beers

I'm thinking the beers might hold the answer. Perhaps they're making me let my food inhibitions down... Wow - writing down all the little things I snacked on last night really depresses me. Is it any wonder I've been having weight issues when I'm grazing on high-carb/fat foods all night long? At least I put all the ice cream down the drain Monday night, otherwise I'm sure there'd be at least 1/2 cup of ice cream up there too. :-(

So goal number one tonight is to run (got a 5k coming up on Saturday!); goal number two is to NOT drink tonight. Or maybe consider a beer my "dessert" to drink later in the evening instead of while I'm making dinner...

Remember Me?

I'm the dunce that completely feel off the wagon. As in "Wagon? What wagon? I don't remember no stinkin' wagon." And subsequently, I've gained 5 pounds back. This just will not do!

I've unfortunately had to cut out Weight Watchers because of a financial constraint. I'm going to have to go it alone for a little while. That scares me a bit, but seriously, if I stay committed to exercising and (as crazy as it sounds) I spend some time every day online looking at healthy living stuff, I think I can do this. I really, really need to get it together. I had hoped to be at goal by May and that isn't going to happen now. Adjusted goal is July.

I did a virtual 5K on my treadmill on Saint Patrick's Day as part of the Running Mate C25K program I was incredibly slow at 44:34, but at least I ran 3.1 miles! My best friend and I are running a 5k in a local college town this weekend. We're running another one closer to home next weekend. I have downloaded the training plan for the 10K program. I can do this! I love running! I like feeling healthy. I like that my skin looks better when I eat healthy and exercise.

Help me do this!

WW Weigh In

So I'm at 152.4. Not bad considering the three weeks off. I also picked back up the C25K training Monday. Redoing week six (two 12 minute intervals) but at least I didn't have to back track.  A toast to being back On Program though!! :-)

It's the Little Things

I didn't make it back to my WW meeting on Wednesday and I haven't gotten back on the treadmill yet. Still working hard on the food front though. Hoping my life will once again take on some resemblance of "normal" soon. Probably not till Sunday though.

The scale at home says I'm hovering around 154, which isn't bad after a 2.5 week bender. BUT!! When I tried to wear my favorite pair of capri pants today, I couldn't!! They barely set on my hips! When I put on a belt with them, I looked like a kid wearing their parents' clothes and synching them in. :) YAY!! for the little victories. :)

So I'm still plugging away. I'm not back to where I was (where I need to be), but I'm also not floundering on the side of the road. I am on the wagon! ;-) Hopefully I can get my behind back in the game over the weekend. Sunday is looking like my best bet. Going to be a busy Friday night and Saturday...

Hope you're having a marvelous weekend! If you're in the process of fighting this weight loss battle and trying to build a life of healthy choices, I hope the weekend is easy for you. See you Monday!

Here We Go Again

I started tracking food again today on WW eTools. It's amazing how accountable it makes you feel. I'm not eating any different than I did yesterday, but just writing it down makes you more aware of what you're doing. Seems to help remind me that I have a goal and I am actively working towards it. All from writing it down!

My sis and I did well last night at the Rodeo. We each chose to eat two small chicken fajita tacos (just grilled chicken in a tortilla). We put a miniscule amount of sour cream on them and shared an order of rice and beans. We also had a margarita. Considering all the walking we had to do and the amazing selection of seriously unhealthy food and beverages that were available to us, I think we did an AWESOME job! No funnel cake or Frito Pie, not even a roasted ear of corn (with butter and Parmesan cheese). We done good and I'm proud of us. Baby steps toward being 100% back on program!

Wow. Time Gets Away

I have to admit, I fell off the wagon HARD while family was in town. Then my nephew left me a present upon departure in the form of a very nasty head cold. I think I've gone through two boxes of Puffs in the last week. Still trying to make good eating decisions, but even there, I've gone astray (stuffed avocado, anyone?). My sis, who is also on WW, and I are going to the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo tonight to see country legends Alabama perform. We will be eating fair food, but we've been plotting what is acceptable and what is not. I will do my utmost to be on program tonight. I want to be back in my meeting and feeling motivated tomorrow (and hopefully, hopefully running tomorrow night). I can *almost* breath normally again. ;-)

Wish me luck! And I swear I'll be back here more. I need the accountability and I've been letting myself slide. :(

I So Sorry

The last week was just nasty. I caught a case of the depresseds and hurt my knee all at once. I tried to stay on program with WW and somewhat succeeded, but "almost" only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. My knee was such that there was NO exercise. So last night, I RAN! And took some steps afterward to prevent future knee pain. My sister in law and her family are flying in tomorrow. They'll be staying with us for a week (her, her husband and my 3 year old nephew).I will be trying to squeeze workouts into all crevices! Just wanted to give you a shout out. I will most likely not post until after they leave, as I won't be coming to work and I hardly use my home computer. Wish me luck! I've come too far to get derailed now!

Plan B

I ended up not working out last night afterall. My knee was seriously cranky and I did not want to do anything I would regret. Instead, I took a long hot bath and tried to relax. Today, my knee feels sooooo much better. So maybe I should listen to my body occasionally at least as closely as I listen to my vanity. Today, still not wanting to push it too far, I am going to do 45 on the elliptical and save my knee for tomorrow's run (week SIX!! 12 minute intervals! WOOT!). I am not expecting great things for tomorrow's weigh in. I will be disappointed, but not surprised, if there is in fact a small gain. I am back on program with my eating. Just trying to get the knee issue settled so I can dive back into exercising full throttle.

And...I Hurt

I did not do my Active 2 workouts at all this week. Thursday, we had plans with out-of-town friends. Saturday morning, I was in pain from Friday's long run (shame on me for pushing myself!). Yesterday, I did my C25K run as scheduled and I'm hurting again today. I honestly don't know if I should do Active 2 tonight! Is this the kind of pain that can lead to injury or is this the kind of pain that is muscle development and normal? :( These are the questions I keep asking myself. Do I workout tonight and risk making it worse? Do I put off another workout (that'd be three A2 workouts in a row!). Is it just because C25K has me running for 30 minutes in a session now? Rest or workout? Aaaaaaaggggghhhh!!!

Weight Watcher-wise, I fell completely off the wagon this past week. We went out twice with our friends from Virginia, I had Girls' Nite Saturday and yesterday, we had people (and their food) over for the Super Bowl. I fully expect a gain on Wednesday. :( Which makes the rest or workout question all the more compelling. I also noticed this past week that I've gotten a little bit more lax with the little nibbles. I have some "pita pocket" snacks which are like tiny puffed crackers. I'll grab four or five of them (which, granted, you get 32 for 3PPV) and not count it. I need to start treating every nibble as 1PPV, even if it might not be. I am only halfway to my goal. Now is not the time to be relaxing. I think I just answered my workout question. I don't know if I'll manage to finish the workout (will not "work through" pain), but I'm sure going to at least try to workout tonight.